is romance dead?

I have often found my conversations with my women friends circling back to the topic of romance. So many men are too busy to stop and smell the roses, let alone pick some up to bring home to their women. What's more, so many women are so done with the more traditional (read "old fashioned") displays of chivalry because they're either too independent or too busy to indulge in the finer art of sappy romance. Has feminism and female empowerment and independence made it harder for our men to be romantic? Or have men just forgotten how to scratch their own itches while also scratching ours?

Yes and yes! Well, yes and maybe. Of course there are still romantics out there, pining for their men to do something romantic for them, to surprise them, to sweep them up off their feet... but in this age of technology and independence, what can these men do to show their undying love and adoration? For me, flowers work great! Flowers, chocolates, dinner dates, movie dates, BRING THEM ON! But I'm definitely more traditional when it comes to my ideas about romance. I want my husband to open the car door for me. I want him to hold open doors. But not all women want that anymore.

We're in a crappy economic crunch that has foreclosures and unemployment rates striking fear into the hearts of people everywhere. Card and flower sales are down (like every other sales and market profits). So what can we do about this downward spiral of romanticism?

FREE DATES. No, I'm not talking about a hookup from Craigslist, but an actual bonafide free date that is guaranteed to spice up the romance factor and possibly even get you some. How's this for a Kodak moment? You're on a nice leisurely walk outside... you're holding hands... he sees a pretty flower and no one is around and he picks it for you. Sound good? Heck yeah! the key here is getting outdoors, doing something fun and relaxing together, and being spontaneous. Bike rides are great too. Here's another free date. Raid the pantry, see what you can scrounge up in the way of a nice dinner. Now raid the entertainment cabinet for dvd's. Find a classic movie (Casablanca) or a classic romantic comedy (The Princess Bride) that you haven't seen in a while, and have dinner and a movie in. So many of us buy dvd's and have massive collections and never watch anything in them. Idea No. 3: Play a board game, play a fun game of cards. Do something in the evening after you've washed the dishes and cleaned the kitchen, or if you have kids, after you've put the kids to bed. Have dessert together, whether it's a simple bowl of ice cream together or something fancier, and sit at the table together and laugh. Make a habit of it, call it your "weekly poker game."

And now for free romance advice that your fella can do for you. You're at home alone. The doorbell rings. You go to answer it but no one is there. You look down to see an envelope at the doorstep. You pick it up and open it and find inside is a homemade card on which he's drawn hearts (badly), your initials together, and XOXOXO all over. Inside he's written a heartfelt note. As you read it your heart melts. He's definitely getting lucky later. Suggestion No. 2: clean the bathroom for your mate, draw a luxurious bath, light candles. Have a glass of wine close at hand and music softly playing in the background. Put clean sheets on the bed and make it up nicely. The scene is now set for a very romantic evening at home! Don't be afraid to go for the double play by making breakfast in bed for your honey in the morning!

So as you can see, there are several simple and easy and FREE things you can do that will put some sizzle back in your love life. Hope they work for you as they have for me! ;-)